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Week 7 results

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Author Topic: Week 7 results  (Read 285 times)
Angelus
The Master of Puppets
Hall Of Fame
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Karma: 42
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Gender: Male
Win/Loss: 42/12/1
Posts: 4454


Should've found a better diet


« on: August 08, 2009, 03:25:44 am »

Special thanks to Chip and Baine for writes.  Big thanks to Baine for taking two last minute writes!

Blackout opens up LIVE from New York City, starting off backstage in Duke’s office.  Duke seems to be irate over something, as usual.  The words “THEY DID WHAT!?!” ring out as sharp as ever as he paces back and forth with his phone at hand.

Tha Duke:
Yeah?  Well them motha’ fucka’s ain’t gonna feel too welcomed!  I can tell you that much!  They tryina’ play ball with tha’ Duke!  Tryina’ take on the champ!  Ain’t nobody gonna mess with the champ!  Fuckin’ crazy!  Aight, I’m gonna go handle this **** real quick...

Duke slams the phone down, then looks up into the camera.  His eyes burning more than ever.  He’s physically shaking, breathing in as deeply as he can...

Tha Duke:
Ain’t NOBODY.  Invading.  MY.  SHOW!

And we cut to Blackout’s opening video package featuring the song “King Nothing” by Metallica.  After the video is through cameras open up ring side with Frank and Alex as a sold out crowd stands on their feet screaming and clapping.

Frank:
Welcome ladies and gentlemen to Friday Night Blackout! 

Alex:
The NEW place to spend your Friday nights!

Frank:
I’m Frank Leary!

Alex:
Alex King, BABY! 

Frank:
And we have a whole night full of spectacular wrestling WHUP ASS!  HOO-AH!

Alex:
The hell are you on? 

Frank:
Listen ****-bird, I’m pretty god damned excited about tonight.  We got a good line up, and things may get a little interesting because it looks as if Showdown has come to Blackout!

Alex:
WHAT!?!  Is THAT what Duke was talking about!?  Someone call security.  Better yet call an exterminator. 

Frank:
Why don’t you tell them to leave.  They’re sitting right over there...

The camera pans over to see Masahide, Ace Borger, and Bryan Blaze sitting front row outside the ring.  Ace and Blaze smirk at the camera while Masahide raises a sign that says “Hi mom”.

Alex:
What a...marvelous bunch.  Now someone get them out.

About that time “Raise Hell” comes over the PA.  Duke immediately comes out of the back with a mic at hand and goes straight to the ring.  He walks up the steps and quickly gets in, turning to address the Showdown stars.

Tha’ Duke:
Why...hello there!  Good tuh’ see ya!  Welcome to Blackout!  Wait...weren’t you originally suppose to be here, Ace?  How’s that workin’ out for ya?  Gotta say...you and Deming really...well, let’s just leave that alone.  And then there’s Masahide, Masahide everybody!  Give it up!  But seriously...the **** is yo’ freaky ass doin’ here too!?!  And last but not least...Bryan *coughcoughCOUGH* BLAZE!  Sorry, choked up a little.  But hey, you know all about that, don’t you? 

Frank:
God damned prick...

Alex:
I dunno, I think he’s in a wonderful mood tonight. 

Tha’ Duke:
Somebody tell me what in the hell you three talent-less mother fuckers are doing on MY show! I could have all three of you thrown out on your ass’s if I wanted to.  So remember...you’re at MY mercy! 

The three rise up and begin making their way over the barricade.  Duke just watches them with a toothy grin before backstage security comes pouring out and down the ramp.  They surround the ring, and place themselves between Duke and the three Showdown superstars.

Tha’ Duke:
I wouldn’t try anything if I were you.  I don’t hire them one night only rent-a-cops like most people do.  Duke buys Grade A security!  And at the snap of my fingers I can have all three of you outta here. 

Ace Borger gestures for a mic.  Blackout’s announcer, Bo Freeman tosses him one real quick.  Ace raises the mic up, looking at Duke.

Ace:
Yeah, maybe you can.  Maybe you can, Duke.  But who said we’re the only Showdown members here?  We’re just the ones you know about.  And you may have us out numbered with these “Grade A security” guys you have.  But you wanna know something?  Ask us if we give a ****.  I want you to look at them, look at em, Duke.  Because I guarantee after they get through tangling with us...you ain’t gonna have em all at 100%. 

Tha’ Duke:
Motha’ fucka’ do you not realize where you are? 

Blaze takes the mic from Ace for a moment.

Blaze:
We bought tickets, didn’t we? 

Now Masa pleads to have the mic.  Blaze hands it over, and Masa looks at his fellow Showdown superstars, telling them to trust him.  He’s got this.

Masahide:
Mister Hamilton, my nigga.  Sup daw-dawg, is it? 

Wrong thing to say.  The crowd goes “OHHHH!” as Duke’s becomes noticeably red.

Tha Duke:
You three can get THE **** out of my arena.  NOW!  Get their ass’s outta here! 

The security all turn and begin making their way toward Ace, Blaze, and Masa.  The three back up and raise their hands up, getting ready for a fight.  The three men start swinging and the guards drop like flies.  Blaze grabs one and sends him head first over the barricade, into some crowd members.  Ace is slamming one guard member’s head into the barricade, while Masa is just going nuts on anyone and everyone.  They put up a good fight, but eventually the numbers game takes it’s toll.  The guards grab the three and restrain them.  Duke grins with confidence but there’s a sudden rush through the crowd, and that grin is quickly wiped away.  A fan hops over the barricade behind Duke, but it’s no ordinary fan.  It’s Cory Chevelle.  He slides into the ring behind Duke who soon turns around and comes face to face with the Silverback.  The security guards stop, allowing Ace and the others to get free.  They just smile.  Duke backs up, unsure what will happen next when all of a sudden, the lights cut out as “Dead and Broken” by Godsmack hits the PA.  Fans all turn their heads-IT’S BAINE!!!  Baine comes running out all fired up as the fans go into a frenzy!

Frank:
 HOLY HELL!  BAINE HAS RETURNED!!!  BAINE HAS RETURNED TO UWE AND HE’S ON BLACKOUT!!!

Baine runs down to the ring, sliding in and getting back up to his feet.  He gets directly in between Chevelle and Duke, and the two engage in one helluva staredown.

Alex:   
Oh ****!  We have Baine AND Chevelle in the same ring!  We could see Blackout vs Showdown here tonight! 

Frank:
Well Ace said they didn’t come alone, but it seems Duke had a trick up his sleeve as well.  Christ! 

Tha’ Duke:
Gentlemen, gentlemen!  As much as I’d love to see Blackout stomp the hell outta Showdown...I DO have a show to run.  But I’ll tell you what...I may have some future match ideas in my head as we speak.  We’ll make a game out of it.  We’ll see which show is dominant over the other by pitting our top stars against the other show’s top stars.  We’ll see who’s dominant going in to mania.  And who’s dominant coming out.

Duke drops his mic, the security guards back off from Ace, Blaze, and Masa, allowing them to leave.  But Chevelle and Baine, both eyeing each other.  Both wanting to know who the ‘alpha male’ of UWE is.  Cameras flash, and at the same moment both men turn from each other and leave the ring. Duke can be seen walking up the ramp smiling with nothing but dollar signs in his eyes.  Meanwhile, we go back to Frank and Alex.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Alex:
Wow!  Well we know Mania is a cross brand event, we know three superstars from each brand will compete in Money in the bank.  But what else might we see? 

Frank:
It’s hard to say, Alex.  But there’s definitely some tension developing there. 

Christopher Dumont suddenly comes walking out, getting a very mixed reaction from the crowd.  He has no music, no video package, nothing.  One would wonder why this is.  Perhaps Duke didn’t wanna spend the money on more licensing, and said **** it.  Or perhaps Dumont just doesn’t need any kind of real entrance.  Who knows.

Bo Freeman:
Alright New York!  This match is scheduled for one fall, and one fall only!  Weighing in at...well, we don’t know.  But we’ll guess 230 pounds.  From Newfoundland, Canada!  He is one of the MOST controversial men in wrestling...CHRISTOPHER.....DUMONT! 

Frank:
Hate em.

Alex:
You don’t know em.

Frank:
I’m ole’ Frank, I know everyone in this business. 

Next up, “Summer 2005" hits the PA.  The returning Ryan Cox makes his way out on stage, also scoring a mixed reaction from the crowd.  He keeps his eyes on Dumont as he walks down the ramp and slides into the ring.

Bo:
And his opponent...weighing in at 205 pounds, or atleast, I think that’s a five.  NEW YORK!  I give to you...RYAN......COX!! 

The Blackout official, Mark Calloway meets the two men in the center of the ring before calling for the bell.  They immediately lock up but Dumont takes control with a judo hip throw.  He quickly tries to follow up with the sharpshooter, going for the legs early on in the match only Cox kicks him back.

Alex:
So...think Cox caught a lot of **** in school for his name?

Frank:
No more than you.  Jew-fro. 

Alex:
WHAT THE ****!!  Seriously...old bastard...

Frank:
Hehehehe....

Cox whips Dumont to the ropes, Dumont returns and Cox jumps over him!  Dumont hits the ropes one more time and comes back but this time he drop kicks Cox!  Cox flies back across the ring, getting to his feet.  But he’s groggy as ever.  Dumont approaches him, kicking him in the mid-section and then grabbing him up for a suplex!  Dumont executes it perfectly, even rolling back to make a cover.  1...2....kickout!  Dumont stands him up and sends him into the nearest corner, but Cox springs up to top rope and comes flying backwards, crashing right into Dumont!  The crowd seems to eat it up!  Now Cox makes a cover!  1...2......KICKOUT!  Cox gets up and Dumont sits up rather quickly as well, rolling Cox up into a tight school boy pin!  1....2....KICKOUT!!!  Both men roll up, Cox steps forward, hooking Dumont’s arms and kneeing him in the stomach-then does a snap STO!  A move he calls “Finger on the trigger!”  Cox covers him quickly.  1....2.........3!!!  The bell rings, and Cox stands up as ref. Calloway takes his hand and raises it victory.  Dumont sits up, rubbing his head, looking around unsure what’s going on.  Then he realizes after seeing Cox with his hand raised in victory.  Dumont hits the mat and shakes his head as he slides out of the ring, leaving Cox to have his moment. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Mean while backstage we see Ace, Blaze, and Masa walking through the halls on their way out of the building when they run into Chip Horton.  Chip removes his sunglasses and can’t help but start laughing at the sight.


Chip:
Don’t feel bad boys, not everyone can make the cut to be on the premiere show that is Blackout.  But hey, if it’s any consolation.  I’ll dedicate my money in the bank victory to Showdown. 

Ace:
Big talk for someone who hasn’t even been listed in the match yet.

Chip:
That’s right.  YET!  But when you’re the king of awesomeNESS, like myself, you have a tendency to just....know these things. 

Ace:
Uhuh.  Keep talkin’ punk.  Just keep talkin’.  Come on guys...

The showdown stars continue to walk, leaving the Prime Time champ alone...

Next up we see Jack Marshall and Ty Bahr standing in the ring, the bell has just sounded, and they’re circling each other around.  Ty Bahr goes to lock up but Jack catches him off guard with a roundhouse!!!  Bahr is stunned!  Jack grabs him and manages to do a back flip, slamming Bahr down into the mat (C-4).  He hops back on to his feet, smiling for the crowd and giving them a wink.  He calls it the audition!  And I don’t think Bahr got it...Jack places one foot over Bahr as the ref counts.  1...2......3!!  The match is over in under thirty seconds!


Frank:
Christ Bahr...

Alex:
Maybe Bahr can sell t-shirts next week.  Cuz’ the guy’s been **** terrible lately. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Both wrestlers are in the ring. It’s James J vs. Star! The bell is rung and both competitor’s star off with a grapple. James J dominates the young woman and throws her down. He starts to taunt her and the fans just go wild. James J lets Star get up. Star walks up to James J. He smiles at her and she smacks the **** out of him. It seems like he lost a tooth or something.

Leary: That was one hell of a smack!
King: You mean ****!! It’s time for a **** thrown down bitches!!

James J loses his smile and gets in Star’s face. You can tell he isn’t happy about taking a smack. Actually he isn’t happy about getting it. James J goes for a clothesline but Star dodges, turns around, and slaps the hell out of James J again. He really starts to get ticked now.

Leary: This woman is dangerously hot!!
King: And just plain dangerous!!

James J walks up to Star and throws a punch. She blocks it and punches him back. He throws another punch and she blocks it again. She punches him again. James gets groggy. Star goes to the ropes, bounces from them and clotheslines James J!!

Leary: I’d stay away from her dude!! She’s fuckin hot and now scary!
King: Speaking of scary, did you know that Final Destination 4 is FINALLY coming out?!? Im going to see it Aug. 28th!! Should be good!
Leary: What the hell does that have to do with this! Im not talking about a god damn movie here Alex! Im talking about this young woman who can rip men’s asses to shreds!!

Star does a springboard elbow drop. But when James J notices this he evades the move letting Star hurt herself. James J now quickly uses this time to get some payback. He takes her chin, lefts it up and starts to beat her face. She is now sitting down on the mat trying to regain conscious. James J bounces off the ropes and drop kicks her in the face. He quickly goes for the pin…

1.…

2.…

Kickout!!

James J shows alittle sign of aggression and feels he should have won that match. While he takes the time to figure out his next move, Star rubs her face to make sure she’s not bleeding. She felt that that fucker is going to pain and pain dearly. More then just a lost. Star was out for blood now. As James J is distracted from not getting the win, Star quickly pins James J thinking she might get the win.

1...

2...
….
Thr-

He kickout just before the ref was ready to put his hand down for the three count. James J gets up from the pin looking at Star with passion. Passion that he would win this. James J and Star grapple again. He tosses her to the ropes and dropkicks her. Now he starts to stalk her and when she gets up she is a bit groggy. James J goes for the GTS!!! He’s got her in the GTS position. She worms her way out and pushes James J to the ref. James J’s head hit’s the ref head and the ref goes knocked out. James J holds his head and turns around to his opponent. She takes the perfect opportunity to hurt him badly. She kicks him in the grape fruits and James J is hurting. She wakes up the ref… nothing. She drags him and starts to bang her hand on the mat. He slowly wakes up. She makes the pin. The ref barely looks up and just stares.
1.….
….
….
….
2.….
…..
….
….
3!!!!!

Ding Ding Ding!!!

Freeman: Here is you’re winner…. STAR!!!!!!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------

UWE Blackout returns from the commercial break as we hear ‘Inside the Fire’ by Disturbed playing, along with a lot of booing. The Prime Time Champion, Chip Horton, has joined Frank Leary and Alex King on commentary for this next match up. It’s Pyronus Souria vs Adam Majors, with the winner progressing to the money in the bank ladder match at WrestleMania. Majors will face Horton with the championship on the line next week on Blackout.

King: “Chip, it really is a pleasure to have you out here with us!”

Horton: “It’s good to be here, Alex. Besides; I have to watch Majors fail miserably. I can’t miss that, can I?”

Leary: “Counting your chickens early, aren’t you?”

Horton: “Nope. He’s not going to win.”

The camera shot pans over to the ring.

Freeman: “Our next contest is scheduled for one fall…”

These lies are leading me astray its too much for me to stay
I don't wanna live this destiny it goes on endlessly

{ A Blue curtain of sparks rain from the entrance way as Majors comes rising from out of the floor }


Bo Freeman: “Our first contestant comes to us from Grand Rapids, Michigan, and weighs in tonight at two-hundred-and-forty-four pounds…The number one contender to the Prime Time Championship…ADAM ‘URSA’ MAAAAAJORSSS!

I see you so please stay strong
I'll sing you one last song and then I'm gone
I don't wanna live this destiny it goes on endlessly

And we once also had a story too
you can see that good men only come in few.

{ Major slowly walks down to the ring staring blankly as he keeps his hands out as fan give him five. }

Even in our greatest moments we may win or we may lose
every song's got it's rules, you've got to learn to make it through.
Maybe one day we can choose how it feels to be a woman or a man
without rules but burried underneath there's a picture glued.

{ Majors slides under the rope and climbs to the top turnbuckle of one of the corners }

So when my body burns in ashes only sing the truth
Let these words strengthen all your views
because these words were meant for you.

{ Majors explodes of the corner landing one one knee in the middle of the ring as the corners explode into blue flames }

These lies are leading me astray its too much for me to stay
I don't wanna live this destiny it goes on endlessly


Leary: “Majors will be looking for a win here tonight. He needs all the momentum he can get next week against Chip Horton.”

King: “Horton will mop the floor with him anyway…”

Leary: “You just keep thinking that. Majors might just pull it out of the bag when it matters.”

Horton: “No, Frank; he can’t beat me. We’ve seen that already. The guy lacks any talent at all. He’s a fluke; I shouldn’t even have to waste my time with him.”

Leary: “Keep thinking that, champ. You might have to eat your words next week.”

Horton: “Not likely.”

The lights fade to a dark red, as “Firestarter” by The Prodigy fades in, already halfway into the intro. As the intro carries on, Pyronus walks out and raises his arms to the sky with his “Rock On” hand sign on them, which cues the pyro next to him to go off.

Bo Freeman: “Competitor number two is from Ottawa, Ontario Candia, and weighs in tonight at one-hundred-and-fify-five pounds…PYRONUS SOUUUUURIIIAAAAA!”

As the flames continue he walks down the ramp. As he reaches the ring, he walks up the stairs and along the ring apron until he reaches the near right turnbuckle, which he climbs up and stands on, still on the outside, as he holds his arms up, making the “Rock On” sign with his hands once again. He then drops into the ring, walks at a semi-quick pace and turns to the audience, holding his arms up as before while flames shoot up behind him, going left and right along the left side of the ring. Then, as his theme music fades, he leans in his corner waiting for his opponent.

Leary: “Pyronus might be looking to catapult himself in to the Prime Time Championship picture here, Alex. I’m sure that thought might be lingering at the back of his mind.”

King: “If he’s got any sense at all it will be.”

Horton: “Exactly! Who wouldn’t want to face me? The best champion in UWE I am; everyone wants a piece. Pyro would lose anyway.”

Leary: “Riiiiiight…”

The referee calls for the bell to be rung, and we’re underway. Pyronus wastes no time in using his speed to his advantage, knocking Majors down with a thunderous dropkick! Majors then groggily returns to his feet, only to be met by right and lefts from Pyronus to his face. Majors stumbles backwards towards the ropes, which he is then flung off of to the other side of the ring, as Pyronus runs to the centre of the ring and takes Majors out with another awesome dropkick! Pyro then drops for a cover…

ONE!

TWO!

THR-NO!

So close for Pyronus!

Horton: “I’m loving this already! Ha-ha! This goes to show just how **** Adam Majors really is. I think I might hold a party in the middle of our match next week.”

King: “Ohh, am I invited?”

Pyronus already smells victory as Majors lies grogilly on the mat. Dragging Majors to his knees, Pyronus then sets up for an enziguri…Which he hits with thunderous force!
Leary: “Oh wow…I reckon this could be it already…”

Sensing his chance, Pyronus leaves Majors motionless in the ring, and hops on to the top turnbuckle. Rallying the fans before hand, he flies off of the turnbuckle and hits a fantastic double corkscrew senton!

Leary: “Flashover! This is it!”

Pyro drops for the pin…

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Horton: “Ha-ha! YES! How embarrassing? How **** embarrassing for Adam Majors! YES! That could not have gone better! Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

Leary: “Where the hell is he going Alex?!”

King: “Probably into the ring, you mental old codger.”

Indeed, Horton removes the headset, and stands up, grabbing his title as he does so. Pyronus, still mid-celebration, decides to get out of the ring, as he doesn’t know what the unpredictable King of Awesomeness could have planned. The crowd begin to boo as KoA slides under the bottom rope, and approaches the groggy Majors, who is on his hands and knees in the middle of the ring, probably oblivious to his whereabouts after that thunderous Pyronus enziguri. Horton drops to the mat and goes head to head with Majors.

Horton: “You’re a **** failure, Majors. You’ve just been embarrassed, but it’s nothing compared to what I have planned for next week. See you then…”

Horton then returns to his feet and picks up his title from the mat, then placing it on his left shoulder. He smirks at the fallen Adam Majors in an evil way, before putting his left foot to the side of Majors’ head and simply pushing him back down to the mat.

Leary: “What a show of disrespect! That’s disgusting…”

King: “Majors deserves it after that performance.”

Now being booed louder than ever, Horton begins to walk up the ramp as ‘Inside the Fire’ by Disturbed plays throughout the arena once more. Holding the title high above his head, Chip Horton then goes back behind the curtain, as we see Adam Majors back on his hands and knees in the middle of the ring, trying to work out what the hell just happened.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Cameras open up backstage in Maria’s locker room.  Most of the Blackout wrestlers, and even the GM are in attendance.  There’s a cake, there’s punch, and there’s Bahr with his guitar despite the tremendous ass whipping he got earlier.  Everyone’s clapping and cheering, wishing her farewell.

Maria:
OHMAHGAWD!  Thank you all so, so, SO much!  I really would like to thank Gawd and stuff, cuz he like, gave me my talents.  And he made me who I am.  And thank you all so much for accepting me and taking me in.  You’ve all been so kind. 

Tha’ Duke:
Maria, I just wanna say it’s been a priv-

Maria:
Can it uncle Tom. 

...

.....

Maria:
Haha!  Oh Dukey I’m just kidding!  You know I love me some dark meat!

Tha’ Duke:
Oh....o...kay.  I was-

Maria:
No but seriously, shut the **** up.  I’ve sat back for weeks beating people like Adam Majors up.  I’ve sat through each and every man in this room’s most terrible pick up lines, and I’ve listened to Bahr’s songs and pretended to give a flying ****.  And you know what?  You guys suck.  You’re all **** useless, and you have zero **** talent!  I’m leaving, kiss this beautiful piece of ass good bye cuz none of you will EVER come close to hittin’ this ass.  And you’ll know I’m the best wrestler UWE has ever ha

“Hurhurhurhur...”

Maria:
Aw, what the **** is that!?

“She awfully purdy, ain’t she Jethro?”

“Yeep.  She sho’ is Elvis.”

“Maybe she give me baby!”

“Yee-up.  Me too.  Heeheehee...”

Tha’ Duke:
Who...the ****....let them in?  You know, cut this ****!  We’re moving on with the fuckin show, and dis’ **** gonna get raped by two hillbillies! 

“FAG hillbillies!”

“I ain’t no FAG!  You’re a FAG!”

“No you dumb-dick, we wrestle in FAG!”

“Oh...yeah.  Well, let’s get that gurl there all drunkered up and show her our love shack!”

---------------------------------------------------------------------



Leary: Good God!! That’s do some serious damage!
Alex: **** yea. I saw this once in a TV show and …..
Leary: We don’t give a **** about you and you’re TV show! This **** is real man! Real I tell ya!!

Barnes takes Marrow’s head and bangs it a couple times to the steel steps. After a while, tiny little blood starts to drip out of Allen Marrow’s head. Barnes tosses Marrow back to the ring. Without wasting anymore time, Barnes wants to wrap this match up. He starts to taunt and at the same time, Allen Marrow starts to get up. Barnes kicks Marrow in the gut as he bends down in pain. Barnes goes for the Barnes Storm as it connects!!

Leary: It seems like this is over!!

Barnes gets the pin!

1...
..
2...
..
3!!!!

Freeman: Here is your winner… “The Wolf” Quentin Barnes!!!

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Backstage now, and we see a rather attractive woman stood waiting with a microphone, with a huge smile across her face; as is the norm with backstage interviewers really.

Elizabeth O’Haver: “Hello UWE fans! I’m Elizabeth O’Haver and I’m here with UWE’s Prime Time Champion; ‘The King of Awesomeness’ Chip Horton!”

A shower off boos greets the announcement of Chip Horton, who can now be seen with a smug, evil grin on his face, with his championship belt proudly sitting on his shoulder.

Elizabeth O’Haver: “Now Chip, I did only have one question for you, but after your actions tonight, I’ve just got to know; why that kind of disrespect?”

Chip Horton: “Because Adam Majors deserves it. You don’t perform like that one week before a title match. The toughest title match of his pathetic career; because it’s against me. Sure, he may have beaten Faulk at one point, but I’m on another level. I find it disrespectful to me that Majors expects to get away with beating me when wrestling like that. It’s horrible, for want of a better word.”

Elizabeth O’Haver: “I see. So, my original and last question, I already think I know the answer; can Adam Majors beat Chip Horton?”

Chip Horton: “Definitely not. It doesn’t matter what kind of match Duke throws us in next week, because the outcome will always be the same; I’ll still be UWE Prime Time Champion. I don’t care if I have to climb a ladder, make him tap out, or knock his ass out. I’ll win. Majors cannot beat me; because I am awesome.”

Horton then rudely just walks away. Liz looks a tad confused at this, as we go back to Frank and Alex for the main event of the evening…

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Fervor Falls is walking backstage with the **** title draped over his shoulder.  He can be heard talking to himself, trying to motivate himself for the match.  “Yeah Ferv, you got this!”  It could very well be working, too.  Then all of a sudden, something strange happens.  The lights begin flicking over head.  He stops and looks around “What the ****!?  Damn cheap ass arena!”  Then something catches his eye.  Effin Rox stands at the end of the hall with official Mark Calloway behind him.  Effin begins charging at Fervor, letting out a battle cry even “KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” what ever that might mean.  It’s Effin.  He’s weird and ****.  Fervor looks around, does he run?  Does he fight?  He has to, his title is on the line.  Fervor braces himself as Effin gets closer.  Then all of a sudden a door swings open, hitting Effin right in the effin face!  Effin falls “Awwwr...****.”  404...all the way.  A janitor walks out of the room, and looks down at Effin.  Oops.  He scurries off as Fervor approaches him, then covers.  1!  2!  KICKOUT!!!  Fervor stands up, looking at Effin who sits up smiling like he’s in the exorcist or some ****.  He gets to his feet, takes a stance, then screams “HIIIII-YAAAAA!”  Effin runs, jumps to the side of the wall and leaps for Fervor.  Fervor just ducks, letting Effin soar right into the other wall.  Fervor turns around laughing.  Laughing until Effin kicks a trash can at him and knocks him over.  It’s heavy duty.

Fervor:
AW ****!  YOU GOT **** ON ME! 

Effin pops ups, nodding “mmhmmmmm!”  This does not sit well with Fervor.  He gets up and grabs Effin, running him face first into the wall.  Effin falls down and Fervor begins stomping the holy hell out of him.  He turns around, picking up the trash can and slamming it over Effin. Fervor says “**** this” and starts walking off.  The camera pans in closely on Fervor’s face now, and just RIGHT behind his shoulder pops up Effin.  Effin takes a broom stick handle and busts it over Fervor’s head!  Fervor stumbles down as Effin wields the mighty broom handles, smacking him all over, leaving welts here and there.  Fervor does his best to cover but can’t.  A staff member cautiously walks by, but Effin catches them.  He asks them, as politely as he can, to hold the broken broom stick handles.  That’s when Fervor gets up on his knees and low blows Effin.

Fervor:
YOU MOTHER FUCKER!  **** DIE!  PIECE OF **** ****!

Fervor plants Effin with a ddt and then takes the broom stick handles and starts wildly hitting Effin all over.  Across the face, the throat, anywhere.  Finally he stops and picks Effin up.  He walks Effin over to a set of doors that lead to the basement.  Effin isn’t about to allow it though.  He starts to fight Fervor, and finally, both fly through the doors with such a fierce momentum they both head for the railing as well!  The broken doors fall to the bottom of the basement, and then in the clearing of this mysteriously dramatic looking dust that came out of no where, we see Effin hanging over the railing and Fervor leaning up against it.  Fervor turns to Effin and grins.  “Later freaky mother fucker!”  “Uh oh” says Effin as the last thing he see’s is Fervor’s fist, and then it’s fade to black.  Effin falls endless to the bottom.  Below him lies a bunch of old, unused equipment and tables.  He crashes through it all, creating another moment of epic dust rising up.  Fervor looks to the ref.  “I **** win via KO.  Got it?”  The ref nods.  Fervor stumbles on out...picking up his belt along the way.  But it isn’t quite over yet.  The camera lowers down to the wreckage.  The dust clears away.  And you can almost hear the heavy, almost haunting breathing (Michael Myers from Halloween style) of Effin Rox.  Then....THEN a hand punches it’s way up as Blackout comes to an end....

But it isn’t over YET!  We come back to Maria in some unknown room.  Jethro and Elvis are no where to be found.  She’s stares into the camera with the meanest scowl possible on her face.  She smiles...

“Oh it isn’t over YET!  I’m going to put an end to this miserable planet!”

She grabs just below her jaw, the sound of her fingers digging into her flesh is sickening.  She doesn’t flinch or show any pain.  Some ‘blood’ drips down as she begins to dig her fingers under her skin.  Suddenly, she rips her entire face off!  And low and behold, Maria Kanellis is a **** predator!  From the funky teeth and jaws, to the unusual dread locks.  Then, she opens her legs, revealing a detonator as well. 

“Boom boom.  Mother...fucker. HAHAHAHAHAHA” 

But have no fear!  The sentai warrior punches through the wall behind her!  The fierce she-predator turns around, roaring at the hero!  He shakes his finger, draws back, and she activates the detonator just as he delivers....

......
........................
............................
......................................

THE FALCON PUNCH!!!!! 

Cameras cut to a bird’s eye view as an enormous explosion appears.  It’s a **** nuclear holocaust or some ****.  Nothing is left of the location.  Nothing. 

Back on the ground, the camera pans over the wasteland.  And in the ash and rubble...lies the mask of the greatest sentai warrior to have ever lived.  Thank you, sentai warrior.  Thank you.
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