So, what will follow is probably one of the most heinous things you'll see as long as you exist on this earth, but it must be done. I'm going to show you all my VERY FIRST RP I ever wrote. Prepare yourselves, people. Prepare for the wackness.I Am #1 by Nelly begins playing. Then red pyro hits on the stage and The One and Only runs out, stopping near the middle of the stage. He shakes his arms, loosening up, and brushes his shoulders off. Then he takes a look to each side, determining his opinion of the fans. He hold two thumbs up sideways, then, when it looks lie he's about to give a thumbs up sign, he points both fingers down, getting some boos from the crowd. He walks up to the ring then walks up the stairs, stepping under the top rope and going to a corner. He sands on the second turnbuckle and raises his arms in the air. Then he pounds his chest with his left hand and holds up an index finger, indicating that he is number one.
One and Only orders a microphone. When he gets it, he begins his first ever in ring speech.
TOO: So, who's the best in this business?
The crowd starts giving their opinions, shouting them at the top of their lungs.
TOO: Okay, I hear some Crusader, Mike Skills, The Devines, X-Factor. Okay, okay, WRONG! You're all wrong. My name states it simply, I am the best. I am the one and only superstar. Everywhere I go, everything I do, I do it better than anyone can. That's right, I can GM better than the GM, I will be a better champion than anyone who's ever held that title, I have better looks than anyone you can think of, from Brad Pitt to Usher. I'm as close as it gets to perfect.
I'm sayin, any of the moves these clowns can do, trust and believe I'll do it better. You think you can ride a car in style...psshhh, everything I do is stylin'. Hey you....
The One and Only points to someone in the crowd, that person is holding up a sign for X-Factor.
TOO: You think that's a sign? You really think that's a sign. I'll kill you in a sign competition.
The One and Only walks into the crowd and beckons that person over to him. The man walks out of the audience and follows The One and Only into the ring.
TOO: Hey, get us some paper and some markers out here, will ya? And While you're at it, get some of the make-up artists out here to judge this competition.
While we ait, let me ask you a couple questions. Who's your favorite wrestler?
Fan: * sort of timidly * X-Factor.
TOO: Huh, I could have guessed that, and how much money do you kmake per year?
Fan: *quietly* 30,000.
TOO: What?! I can't hear you. Speak up.
Fan: *embarassed* I make 30,000 dollars a year.
TOO: Wow, that kinda sucks. Matter of fact, that really sucks. But, you know what, I'm going to help you out. If the judges say your sign is above seven out of ten, I'll hire you as my manager, how does that sound?
FAN: *energized* That sounds great.
TOO: Alright, oh, here they come. Hurry now, hurry. This man's future is on the line here. I saw his family up there and they really, and I mean really need him to get this job. He can barely afford decent clothing for them.
The materials are supplied and the judges stand in the ring.
TOO: Alright. On your mark, get set, go!
Both The One and Only and the fan from the stands go vigorously to work, trying their hardest to make a good sign. After five minutes, the judges call time.
One and Only holds up a sign of himself, almost entirely picturesque.
Judges: That sign gets a ten out of ten in all categories. Great work.
Then the fan shows his. It's not picturesque, but it's a great poster, showing, once again, X-Factor.
Judges: That sign gets a nine out of ten.
The fan starts jumping up and down because he got over 7 overall.
TOO: Well, I've proven once again that I am the best. I am also a man of my word. What's your name, sir?
Fan: *voice trembling in exctement* My name is Jared Black.
TOO: You are now my new manager, Jared. What's better, you've just doubled your salary from 30,000 to 60,000 dollars per year. Great job, Jared.
The One and Only extends his hand and Jared shakes it. The Jared looks up and waves to his family, who wave back excitedly, before exiting to the back with The One and Only.
Graham: Did that guy really get taken on by The One and Only as a manager?
John: Well, I think he did. The One and Only has just given this fan a rare oppurtunity to be part of a wrestling company and to be part of The One and Only's young career.
Graham: Hmm, I guess he isn't as bad a person as I thought he was.
Well, now you see what depths I've come from. Please discuss, or post your own if you feel so inclined.
